Mindfulness Monday: Coping Mechanisms

I’ve been having a bit of a tough time of late, mentally speaking. It’s not unusual but that doesn’t make it any less annoying. 

I’ve overstretched myself and my mental wellbeing has taken the hit. I’m peopled out. I have no socialising left in me. Any fellow introverts and social anxiety sufferers will know what I’m talking about. 

Other the years, I’ve built up a small repertoire of helpful things to keep me sane(r) when out and about to minimise the fallout afterwards. You’ll find them below.

1) Breathe.

That’s right, remember to breathe. Obvious, non? Often when I’m in a social situation and can feel the panic rising, the first thing I notice is that my breathing becomes rapid. If you notice this happening, try to concentrate on slowing it down. Breathe in and out evenly, counting each breathe as you do. 

2) Listen.

Distraction is one of the most used tools in my mental health toolbox. When in a group of people, the best way to calm that inner whine is to concentrate. Focus on what the person you’re talking to is saying. Not only does it make you an awesome friend but it may stop you from dwelling on intrusive thoughts. 

3) Ask questions

You’ve upped your friend game by showing yourself to be actively involved in the conversation so why not step it.up a notch? BAM! Engage in the conversation. It might be the last thing.you even want to try to do but it will help.

4) Take a Break

Pop out for a smoke or a “vape” (ugh), nip to the loo or just say you need to make a quick call. Taking just 2-3mins to yourself can be enough to ground you and get yourself back under control. Make sure to use this time wisely though, with breathing exercises and the like. Try not to spend it obsessing over everything that’s been said.

5) Avoid Caffeine & sugar

Having given up alcohol for the year, this is one that I often struggle with. Most pubs will have a variety of soft drinks avaliable but these can still be quite expensive. Cola and lemonade, while the cheaper options, do come with the downside that you’ll be awake for hours afterwards.

I know these all seem super obvious but they’ve helped me in the past and sometimes it’s easy to overlook the simple things. If you have any other suggestions, let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear them.

Laters xx 

The Learning Curve

Hey there, blog fans!

I’ve had this little blog for around 18-months now. I don’t have the most followers or the most daily views and that’s ok. When I started this (cheese warning) it was because I needed a way to empty my head. I updated sporadically (does everyone else read that word in Brittany Murphy’s voice?) and it was all a bit random. 

Since those early days where I didn’t seem to give two hoots about giving a post a title, a lot has changed. I’m in the process of re-launching my horror blog (The Dunwich Blogger) and have already plotted out a series of posts for 2015 that I’m pretty excited about. 

So, in the last 18-months is there any wisdom I feel I can share? Well, yes but it’s probably all the same stuff you’ve read before.. 

1. Numbers Don’t Matter – Ok, that’s a lie. They do but not as much as you may be making them matter. Of course we all want to have popular blogs and yes, I do get frustrated when I see blogs that started the same time as me with 1000s of followers while I pootle along with my 180-ish. You know what though? I love my followers and am so grateful for them. I mean, crikey! There are people out there, who I’ve never met, who WANT to read what I’m writing. I haven’t had to pay them or anything! That’s pretty awe inspiring. 

2. Spell Check Is Your Friends –  I write like I speak and sometimes, just sometimes, it means that a sentence won’t make any sense (“You don’t never know” being a prime example). The one thing that I try to make sure I always do before I press Publish, however, is read through my post. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been put off a blog due to basic spelling errors. I don’t claim to be the best speller in the world but, oh boy, proof-read – Please! 

3. Interaction, interaction, interaction – the blog dream is having millions of followers with minimal interaction. No? That’s just me? Oh. Realistically, you’re unlikely to ever reach those heady heights without indulging in some self promotion and throwing out your 2-bits in a twitter chat. I’ve “met” some fab people through blogger chats & it has definitely helped my (not at all important) stats improve.

4. Don’t Sweat It – also known as “if it’s not fun, you’re not doing it right” – quit giggling! Bloggers block is a real thing, man. It’s real and it’s tough. If you happen to be visited by this foul mistress, don’t try and force it. Take a break & a step back. Your blog and followers will still be there when the fog lifts.

There are probably a billion other nuggets of advice I could give you but:
a) I’m not qualified
b) it wouldn’t be anything new
c) I’ve had a total brain fart and can’t think of anything else.

Go forth and blog in peace!

Laters xx

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